Months before its release, the Mormon and ex-Mormon community were abuzz with the upcoming release of Hulu’s adaptation of “Under the Banner of Heaven”. I am in Utah and the Mormon community still surrounds me, so inevitably those discussing this docu-drama were and are all over my social feeds. I expected the usual comments when anything is released that doesn’t paint the Mormon Church in perfect light — people who were worried that it would influence investigators or lead people to think this is an example of what the Church is. I didn’t expect to read what I read on the Deseret News before the series even premiered. The article in question can be found here: Under the Banner of Heaven on FX is bad for Latter-day Saints. Here’s why – Deseret News
I wanted to write about this sooner, but between my health problems and other life struggles, it felt impossible to muster up the energy to discuss this topic in the way I wanted. After all, this is the Church that has caused a great deal of trauma in my life. Now, before you chime in saying, “but Sara, it’s the people, not the Church. People are imperfect but Church and its gospel are perfect”, save your breath. Gaslighting is not welcome here, okay? Even if you don’t see it now, even if you believe that phrase as much as you believe the gospel of Christ, even if you’re ignorantly repeating this quote that’s been fed to you you’re entire time in the Church — and for most of us converts, long before our baptism — those words are invalidating and gaslighting victims of abuse in the Church. I can write an entire blog about this — fuck, an entire novel even — but that is for another time.
Anyway, back to the article: Under the Banner of Heaven on FX is bad for Latter-day Saints. Here’s why – Deseret News Here’s the thing, that title was catchy and at first I thought it was going to dive into something a bit more groundbreaking, less judgemental. Perhaps how it is impacting those who were involved in this heartbreaking situation. I can’t even imagine working through that trauma and trying to live your life but seeing your life being made into a highly anticipated TV show. I know I felt broken listening to a podcast discussing my friend, Krystie Stuart, and her disappearance. As much as I wanted more and more people to talk about it, it felt strange reading strangers chime in with their opinions. But, I digress. This article did nothing of what I hoped it might. In fact, it went the complete opposite direction.
So here is my response:
It’s hard not to grow bitter with members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Saints, aka the Mormon church, but it’s not for the reasons you think.
During my time in the Mormon church, I learned that most of the Mormons I encountered love pointing out fallacies – especially when people would question policies, disagree with doctrine, or even ex-members who would call out the trauma the Church can cause. They are quick to point out generalizations while making their own assumption that ex-Mormons apply their perspective to all Mormons or members of the Church. It is so much like the self-righteous man who thinks he is doing the world a service by commenting on a woman’s story of sexual assault or even just a story-time of a bad but laughable tinder date – “NOT ALL MEN!” Yes, we know, Kevin. But goddamn if it isn’t the majority. We know it’s not all Mormons. It’s not all evangelicals. It’s not all Christians. But I would argue that in the case of high-demand religions such as Mormonism or Jehovah’s Witnesses, it is a significant amount. I can’ tell you how many comments I receive, both online and in my everyday life — shout out to my Uber driver for telling me “the Church is perfect but the people are not” on my way home from the ER after explaining why I didn’t want a patriarchal blessing (he offered) as I am no longer Mormon and then answering why I am no longer Mormon — and I guess I understand. I understand that it’s easier to tuck away anything uncomfortable, to chalk it up as an angry member who wasn’t really “in it” to begin with, someone that the Adversary has led astray. Because calling out language that generalizes or any other “fallacy” makes us feel superior and safe from the threat of questioning the foundations of our religion. If instead, we empathized with the hurt and the pain these institutions and their members are causing, we are forced to leave the comfort of our bubble.
As you read the article you’ll notice the similar mocking tone that we heard from Elder Ballard, as they cite statistics showing just how safe and economically thriving Utah is, implying that somehow the producer of Under the Banner of Heaven’s depiction of this particular set of Mormons is completely invalid because 1) Black has been outspoken against the Church’s policies against marriage equality 2) This depiction of a specific set of Mormons from a horrible even in the past does not adequately represent the Church and its members today
Um, sir, this is a true-crime docu-drama. This is not about you or members of the Church today. The mere fact that instead of empathizing with the horrific events that occurred you can only see how this doesn’t represent YOU and YOUR beliefs and YOUR experience in the Church is a reflection on your lack of emotional intelligence, critical thinking, and to be frank — your ability to be Christ-like. Of course, we’re not ready for that conversation now, are we?
And because this article glossed over some very real and disturbing statistics in Utah:
https://ibis.health.utah.gov/ibisph-view/indicator/complete_profile/Rape.html#:~:text=According%20to%20Federal%20Bureau%20of,to%2042.6%20per%20100%2C000%20adults. [According to Federal Bureau of Investigation, the rape rate in Utah has been consistently higher than the U.S. rate. In 2019, the reported rape rate in Utah was significantly higher than the U.S. rate at 56.8 per 100,000 adults, compared to 42.6 per 100,000 adults.]
https://ibis.health.utah.gov/ibisph-view/indicator/complete_profile/SuicDth.html#:~:text=From%202018%20to%202020%2C%20the,to%2017%20and%2018%2D24. [From 2018 to 2020, the age-adjusted suicide rate in Utah was 21.4 per 100,000 persons, with an average of 657 suicides per year. Utah had the 6th highest age-adjusted suicide rate in the U.S. in 2019. In 2020, suicide was the leading cause of death for Utahns ages 10 to 17 and 18-24. It is the second leading cause of death for ages 25 to 44 and the fifth leading cause of death for ages 45-64. Overall, suicide is the eighth leading cause of death for Utahns (age-adjusted rate).]




